Okay, since I never got to give my piece at FTC (Whitney whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy? </3 </3 </3 love you girl but
) I wanted to give my perspective on the game as I played it. :)
ASHLEY'S GAME EXTRAVAGANZA
PART ONE: PRE-MERGEI came in to the game knowing I was bottom rung, so I made the decision to treat Nama like gods gift to the earth and act like the most hardcore noob in existence. "
Wow you guys are sooooo helpful <3<3<3<3 I would be lost with you!"
PB sent me a PM about an idol he had - you'll see in my confessionals that I thought it was bullshit the second I saw it. LOL PB for real? You sent me an image that was uploaded to imgur less than an hour before you sent the message
Of course I was going to check that shit! But I played along because hey - I was supposed to be a hardcore noob. "
Wow! Thanks for telling me! You are so great PB ilu."
THE MOLEI initially had no interest in the mole twist because I came in so late and knew nobody's game style. The mole from Ovambo (Ralph) never contacted me. To be honest, I had more immediate concerns - like not being the first boot on what was apparently a tribe that was shit at challenges. Not only was I new, I was a swapped new player from old-Ovambo. Jeff you asshole lol nice set-up you gave me. The mole was just whatever. Then Cochran messaged me asking who I thought the mole was - what? I have no fucking idea lol is it you?.
I got a message from Sophie as well, and she seemed cool. I gave her the same treatment as PB and saw pretty early that those two were a unit. She mentioned something about the mole not having logged in for a few days and that hopefully it was Elyse and shit which seemed really weird to me because Jeff said the moles stayed on their tribes and that doesn't make sense if the mole was out of the game. I also saw that the
Last Login information for your own tribe's mole was
NOT VIEWABLE. How the fuck did Sophie know when the mole was logging in?
I knew who the mole was on the first/second day and I wasn't even interested in looking for them. What even lol.
Ovambo here I come!I got to talking with Grant at Nama as well. We made a deal that involved us both getting to merge and hooking up there. I told him about the Nama plan to trick him into thinking the mole was Cochran. I told him I thought the mole was Sophie but he thought it was more likely PB (or so he says). Semhar told Grant he could guess her and get sent back so I intended on telling Sophie and PB that to make it look like she took an idol clue when Grant made his guess.
At that tribal -
I ASKED FOR A CLUE TO THE IDOL. Jeff never announced it and so it didn't matter. For those interested, the clue was exactly the same as the first post-merge immunity idol clue. I had wayyyy longer than the rest of you to figure it out :P
The rest of pre-merge was securing myself a merge spot. I kissed ass and played the fool and it worked for me.
PART TWO: THE MERGEHolla bitches I made it to merge! I immediately contacted everyone on Ovambo and especially Grant about joining forces. I told him not to be obvious about me joining him so that I could get information from Nama for that vote because I'd heard from PB that Kristina and Ralph were going to flip and it didn't want it leaking that I was joining Ovambo so early.
Grant starts acting crazy fucking shady. It really alienated me Grant, and it really soured my relationship with you. I was gung ho about joining you and you stonewalled me. I gave you all of the information I had, and you wouldn't tell me ANYTHING - not even who was on your bloody alliance. How the hell did you expect me to vote with you when you wouldn't even give me BASIC information? You just kept telling me to trust you and repeatedly questioned me about getting more information and "
Are you REALLY with us?".
I was fairly close to Cochran at this point - both of us felt really off-put by Sophie and PB's last-minute "VOTE SEMHAR!" messages without any explanation. I won't lie I was pretty devastated that you all voted him out. Of anyone on Nama he'd have been the most likely to flip - he didn't seem to trust PB or Sophie at all. I even TOLD you that Grant
but you all voted him for being a vote-doubler.
Why the fuck did nobody trust anything I told them? I was legit honest with everyone, even If I was pretending to be an idiot. But Cochran - I DID know that Kristina and Ralph were the people PB was trying to flip - I didn't tell you because I didn't want you to feel on the outs by yourself, and I genuinely didn't want you going home anyway so I would've protected you if I'd been able to.
SURPRISE BITCHES: I VOTED MIKE
This was probably the funniest part of the game for me. Grant never game me a name to vote for and was being hella shady (fucking seriously, Grant) so I voted with Nama. That didn't go down as planned so I went into damage control.
I told Kristina that I'd tricked Cochran into using the same voting comment as me (because she knew the comment I submitted before the vote) and that's why he was so angry at PB - thinking that PB had tricked us and flipped. For some reason, she apparently believed it
I told Grant that I hadn't submitted any vote. To whoever actually didn't submit a vote that round - HOLLA for not coming forward because that worked out so well for me. Everyone on Ovambo just seemed to eat it up, it was beyond retarded. I gave conflicting stories and everything (I had to adjust when Jeff sent that mass-PM about how the votes really went down) - I couldn't believe you guys didn't realise I was a huge fucking liar at that point.
I made a plan to throw an Ovambo under the bus for the 5th Mike vote, and that victim ended up being
RALPH. Sorry Ralph, you were just convenient. I didn't expect it to work, but it DID! You all thought Ralph was this huge traitor and the poor guy never flipped at all.
Sorry for ruining your game, Ralphy <3
I told Mike this at F4 and he thought it was pretty funny :P
PART THREE: GOODBYE NAMA, HELLO OVAMBO (FLIP ATTEMPT 2,0)After you all fell for that "
I no-voted!" line, I was IN. I saw Nama as a sinking ship and wanted to get the fuck off that bitch before I went down with it.
I was annoyed at PB for spending all of his time making retarded conflicting F2 deals (did you REALLY think that Ralph and Kristina weren't going to talk each other and compare the deals you made?) rather than focusing on the here and now - We were FINAL 12, not FINAL 6.
PB was making me and Sophie look like retards, which I could not have. Sophie I thought was tight with PB so I figured it was time to part ways with her as well, so I flipped and voted PB.
What made this so glorious is that BOTH David and Mike tried to make a move here and flipped to vote with Sophie and PB, but because neither PB or Whitney voted, and I flipped, they ended up on a tie and we re-voted all for PB. LOL at PB thinking he was running the show (sorry boy, you're great, but you were so full of shit - most of my "who is on the bottom of their alliance and doesn't know?" style questions during that challenge I wrote down you.
After that, the Ralph vote happened. I was happy to go along with it - It was funny to me that you guys all wanted him out for something he never did LOL but I wasn't going to question it.
PART FOUR: ASHLEY MAKES SOPHIE USE HER IDOL (or alternatively #JULIEGODDESS 
)Kristina, I really liked you at this point, but you were VERY strategic and I found it extremely threatening. Stephanie was a rando for me at that point and I considered her in your pocked. You guys all wanted to get rid of Whitney and Julie, and I was beginning to suspect at this stage that Ovambo were setting me up to be their goat. Grant, you've said here at Ponderosa I was never in your real F4 (
) and the way Kristina spoke to me about Steph and you all, I felt like I was being set up. I trusted I'd get taken to near the end of the game, but not that I was really considered a close ally of anyone at all.
Kristina, you say I was wrong about you, and maybe I was, but that's neither here nor there really - I considered you a huge threat and so I wanted to take you out.
I sent Sophie this enormous message about teaming up with Whitney and possibly Julie to take out the heavy hitting Ovambos. In the end, Sophie didn't even need to use her idol, but at the time of planning, expecting Ovambo to split votes wasn't a reliable strategy. I needed her to play her idol. Even if they DID split votes, flushing her idol was a good move for me anyway. I was pushing for a Kristina blindside. I was aggressively pushing for it. I knew Julie wanted to not be seen as a goat so I approached her asking if she'd take part in a big move. I told both her and Whitney that they were the targets of the next two votes so both were happy to prolong their stay here by any means :) Sophie wanted to vote Grant but I didn't really want to at all - at this point I was talking seriously with Grant about going to the end together. However, I didn't want to be a goat for Ovambo, and making THIS move I felt was absolutely vital for me if I was going to go into F3 with anything to show for myself. Sophie never got comfortable with the Kristina vote and was pushing Grant all the way to tribal so I just let her have it. I spent the next few days wishing I'd put my foot down and forced the Kristina vote because of all the trouble I was having with her after that vote. I KNEW she was strategically gifted, and I honestly believed at the time that Grant would have been a better ally for me.
Julie was one of the only people at merge from Ovambo to really talk to me. She was honest and pretty sincere and I knew I could trust her. Sure, her goat rep would've helped me at F3, but she was genuinely fab and I was really happy for her that she could say she took part in a game-changing move. I can't speak for anyone else, but every tribal I talked her and Whitney up I was being genuine. They deserved credit for taking part in the plan - I may have been the mastermind of it, but it'd still be living in my head if they hadn't come on board. Julie was the real star of this vote for flipping with us - if she hadn't it would have been GAME OVER for me.
Sophie, I was truly shocked you were willing to get past me flipping on you
that just made me love you. I was going back and forth about when to vote you out, but I loved you :P After Whitney failed to vote and screwed us (lol Whit you did screw us over, but I don't hate you for it now) that whole thing became a moot point, and I needed to maintain loyalty to the group if I was going to get jury votes from any of you - so I went to rocks for you, and Julie paid the price :( I was telling Julie to vote for you so I wouldn't have to break my promise :P but she didn't want to either.
PART FIVE: DAVID FLIPS... AND FLIPS SOME MOREWe knew the big move would lead to a 4/4 tie so we NEEDED someone to flip. I took the lead at this point and PMd everyone saying they could flip to us and guarantee themselves safety till F5 (and beyond possibly) or go to rocks. We knew we were going to rocks on our side of the tie - I had an idol that I used just in case though. Nobody was flipping back to Ovambo after the move we'd just made. If Kristina wants to call that bullying, that's fine. I was straight up about the situation. None of us were flipping so you can flip or go to rocks. Your choice.
We always expected it would be David, and in the end, he chose us over rocks.
But we weren't going to protect him. Our offer for protection doesn't cover people we know are going to immediately flip back and we knew David would straight away. There was no doubt about it. So we voted for David but Whitney didn't show up to vote so it went to a tie. This seriously is the moment we all got screwed :( I was really aggressive with David at the following tribal because he acted like he'd gotten to F6 using skill, when he got saved by a no-show. He was really conceited about it. I know I'm confident in my own abilities, but I made the moves to back that up. David broke the cardinal rule of Survivor - that is don't float your way to the end. And he had the gall to act like he'd really put in the hard yards to earn his place.
Whitney went home at rocks. :( For the next two votes that took out Sophie and Julie I was like:
But that's the nature of the game - shit doesn't always go our way. The thing that hurts the most is that that's what ultimately cost me F3 :( I had no chance at that challenge with Stephanie with my internet the way it was, and I'd been traveling for the week previous and couldn't do as well as I would've liked.
I went to rocks with Julie instead of voting for Sophie - not because I wanted to go to the end with Sophie as has been speculated - because I wasn't going to ruin my chances at F3 by skipping out on my core alliance when both Whit and Julie had previously gone to rocks for it. Flipping would've held no benefit for me either as Ovambo weren't taking me to the end no matter what. I didn't play this game to place. played this game to win, and flipping would've guaranteed I never made it to F3. I'd rather go out on a rock with a good legacy than go down as a person who bitched out at the last minute to secure herself 5th. I'm not dumb enough to think anyone would have kept me over Julie, and at that time I didn't have internet access to attend the challenges - I had to PAY international data-roaming to get to the last two challenges before last night (a grand total of about US$140 it cost) and I was devastated that even after paying, my browser timed out and I got eliminated from the challenge in the first round. :'(
PART SIX: FINAL FOUR (or MIKE, YOU FUCKING GOAT! 
)So I made it to F4! I was initially ok with the counting challenge but it became apparent REALLY FAST that my laptop and wifi connection wasn't going to match Stephanie's :( She was able to post faster than my browser took to refresh. She ended up with a 1000 post lead within the first 2 hours!!!
But I continued in that challenge for TEN HOURS before having an emotional breakdown and withdrew. I couldn't handle it anymore. I'd had such a rough time in real life this last week (the main reason I was traveling was because of a major death in the family) and knowing I was getting taken out because of a shitty internet connection was crushing me - as soon as I hit 7000 posts and saw Stephanie was already at 8600 I actually started crying. I PMd Jeff and Stephanie telling them I quit and I couldn't deal with the stress of it anymore. I had the hosts telling me to keep going in my confessionals but I was physically shaking from the stress of everything and couldn't even LOOK at the Arena boards with feeling strained and overwhelmed. That's TEN STRAIGHT HOURS of my life that is gone.
To top it all off - honestly I think this is what put me over the edge.
The fact that I was battling for my life in this game and Mike had the gall to throw it in my face that this was my swan song by pulling out of the challenge, knowing he had a free ride to F3, made me so, soooo angry.
He sent me a PM less than an hour into the counting challenge telling me if I won he'd consider voting out Stephanie, and that it was clearly a challenge between me and Steph so good luck with that. He then logged off and never returned to the challenge. He knew he was going to F3 so SAT OUT ON PURPOSE and rubbed my face in it. That is the most disrespectful gameplay I've ever seen and for that, Mike will
NEVER be getting my vote as a result.
I knew that even if I'd magically been able to win the challenge, I would've taken Stephanie to the end with me anyway. She slogged it out at the challenge for 11 hours before stopping when I told her I had quit. Threat or no, she
DESERVES to be there. I don't hold it against her not wanting to take me to FTC - I know I would have been a threat to get votes, and with Mike and David, she's pretty much guaranteed herself the winner of this game.
I told David about what Mike had said and it genuinely seemed to piss him off. I worked so hard in that challenge and had to out up with that shit from Mike. Mike played a decent game till then, but he just totally lost ALL respect after that. Even David the MIGHTY GOAT was able to see that, and I honestly appreciate him trying to help me out at that last tribal. He game me a chance even when it would have only hurt him if I'd made it through. For that, David, I thank you.
Sophie, during my meltdown I made you a picture - I didn't expect to become so close with you during this game - If I read your confessionals and you don't actually like me, I will go and die in a hole right now I would be so god damned devastated. During that fucked up time when I quit the challenge,
all I wanted to do was talk to you - my last confessional entry was about how I was really happy I was probably going to be able to talk to you again when I got to Ponderosa <3
It's been lovely playing with you all <3
by Jeff Probst » Thu Apr 10, 2014 9:14:29 pm 
